... den 24.Xii.1931" (1988)
(Verstümmelte Nachrichten for baritone and instruments)

…, the 24. xii. 1931
Garbled News for baritone and instruments
1988/91

Texts 

I.

… the thirty-fourth of December in the twenty-first century,

     at twenty past five in the morning. Yes.

… the thirty-fourth of December seventeen-hundred-and-thirty-four?

… the thirty-fifth of December nineteen-hundred-and-twenty-nine?

… the thirty-first of December sixteen-hundred-and-forty-six?

… the thirty-third of December thirteen-hundred-and-fifty-five?

… the thirty-second of December eighteen-hundred-and-seventy-three? No.

… the twenty-fourth of December nineteen-hundred-and-thirty-o …?

II.

Bombs, gas, machine-guns were used to put down a serious uprising by

convicts at the Villa Devoto prison in Buenos Aires. Ninety-two convicts

attempted to escape from the penitentiary. They broke windows and pelted

the warders with bits of furniture. A violent struggle ensued. Some succeeded

in clambering onto the prison roof. Major troop and police reinforcements

were called in to besiege the convicts. Eventually they were overwhelmed,

and led back to their ce …

III.

I … General Honjó, Japanese commander-in-chief, do not intend to occupy the

North Manchurian city of Ch’en-ch’ing. However, I must purge the region in

question of bandits, and can not predict how far this action will need to go!

Schó! Trá! Té! Wó! Sché! Kiá! Tá! Tó! Ké!

I. Honjó.

IV.

The Nationalsozialist smokes only “Parole”!

Six Pence. Mild and aromatic.

V.

The tragic news from Rome that the sudden collapse of a roof in the Vatican

Library has left five people dead draws attention to the tragic news from Rome

that the sudden collapse of a roof left five people …

In the Papal Library, scholars of all persuasions make discoveries, often of

unsuspected importance: five …

VI.

… but what makes me write this? In Germany there are many people who

this year will peer anxiously into the future. Many will be hoping to seek

refuge from unemployment overseas, and be able to make a proper living.

They shouldn’t kid themselves. It often involves a complete change of

life-style; among other things, this means abandoning every trace of the magic

of Christmas at home. If my letter gets to Cologne, people there will be

celebrating Christmas. Here in Argentina, the celebration occurs in the hottest

part of the year, and loses much of its …

VII.

From Palestine, bells peal without ropes!

At about half past six in the morning, local time, Canon Bridgeman will press a

button in the Church of the Holy Birth in Bethlehem. On the stroke of midnight in

America, the electric current, sent wireless from the Jerusalem Post Office via Egypt,

will set the bells of St. Thomas Church in New York in mov …

After this, all the church bells of North America will begin to ring in Christmas Day:

Didon dindon dindon dindon dondon dindon …

Texts assembled from newspaper reports from 24. December 1931: Mauricio Kagel

English by Richard Toop